The Stop-Gap Life

It seems like we have been living the stop-gap life for so long. First COVID, and all its shortages. Then school and work and family and all that. It never seems like there is enough time, so I did things part way, half-way, just to get us until the next day. It's not the way I wanted to live.

I have done so many things to prolong the inevitable. I mended holes in socks, only for the socks to get bigger and better holes and still need to be replaced. I portioned out things from the refrigerator so that I knew how many days I can go before I have to go to that other grocery store. I threw together meals from random bits and pieces, just to give myself another day to come up with a meal plan. I hand washed a few pieces of silverware and a plate or two to avoid running the dishwasher for one more day. I said that we should wait until X to do Y. I put a lot of things off. I tried to plug holes that would inevitably eventually open again.

Our stop-gap life has gotten better at times, and worse at times. I am trying now, though, to learn where to stock up and prepare, and where to let things go. It is an elusive balance that lives in the gray, rather than the black-and-whites of life. I envision a day when we won't have to live this life anymore, and to be fair, we have made progress. To really progress, though, I think I have to change my mindset.

There is a time and place for just making ends meet. Eventually, though, I have to slow down, stop, evaluate, pray for God's wisdom, and make a plan. The stop-gap life becomes a vicious cycle unless I do.