The Importance of Play for Adults

How often do adults tell kids to, "Go play?" And yet, adults struggle to find time to do so themselves. Play is important, for adults, too!

Play is important for an adult's identity. So much of an adult's life focuses around work and productivity. Play is time for fun, and for the sake of fun. "Play is apparently purposeless," writes Brene Brown (2010), and maybe that is part of how it serves its purpose, to help people become more sure and certain of themselves without productivity metrics. “But play is serious. Play is absolute. Play is the complete absorption of something that doesn’t matter to the external world, but which matters completely to you," writes Katherine May (2023). And maybe play is part of the exploration involved in finding the things that really matters.

Play is important for teaching social skills. This holds true for kids and for adults. "Play shapes our brain, helps us foster empathy, helps us navigate complex social groups, and is at the core of creativity and innovation" (Brown, 2010, p. 100). How many friendships form around play, or some type of recreational activity? And how many of us subconsciously learn while engaging in this time of play? Sometimes hard things happen in play, but that teaches us to love, and to love better (Goff). It teaches us humility (Jacobson & Masonheimer, 2021). The world could use of both, I think!

Play relieves stress. The lives of both adults and kids are full of stress. Adults have just lived in the stress longer. Play helps relieve that stress because it requires giving up control. "Play and control cannot coexist," writes author Rebekah Lyons (2019). "Play...breaks us out of our stressful routines and rejuvenates us." It encourages relaxation to kick in (Richo, 2011). And we need play not just some of the time, but at expected times so as to break up our schedules. "While the stressors may not go away, we can develop a rhythm that helps us become more resilient to deal with them."  We need to organize our time such that we make time for play (Levitin, 2015). While we often see play as optional, we really shouldn't.

Play strengthens relationships. Who has heard that men make friends by doing activities side by side? Well this is true, not just for men, but for women, and for partnered individuals. “Play isn’t a luxury or an indulgence, but a necessity for a successful, happy relationship," write marriage researchers (Gottman et al., 2019). “Play don’t just about being with each other, it’s about connecting with each other. When we play together as couples, we’re developing our trust and intimacy.” We attune and connect (van der Kolk, 2015, p. 217). Who doesn't want greater trust, intimacy, and connection in relationships? That is the type of stuff that sustains!

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And how do kids learn to play? From adults! In an age that increasingly has our faces fixed to our screens, I think we could all do better to play a little more, stress a little less, and maybe face each other a little more. Who knows how future generations might benefit?

References:

Brown, B. (2010). The gifts of imperfection: Let go of who you think you're supposed to be and embrace who you are. Hazelden Books.

Gottman, J., Schwartz Gottman, J., Abrams, D., & Abrams, C. (2019). Eight dates: Essential conversations for a liftetime of love. Workman Publishing Company.

Jacobson, L., & Masonheimer, P. (2021). The flirtation experiment: Putting magic, mystery, and spark back into your everyday marriage. Thomas Nelson.

Levitin, D. J. (2015). The organized mind: Thinking straight in the age of information overload. Dutton.

Lyons, R. (2019). Rhythms of renewal: Trading stress and anxiety for a life of peace and purpose. Zondervan.

May, K. (2023). Enchantment: Awakening wonder in an anxious age. Riverhead Books.

Richo, D. (2011). Daring to trust: Opening ourselves to real love & intimacy. Shambhala.

van der Kolk, B. (2015). The body keeps the score: Brain, mind, and body in the healing of trauma. Penguin Books.

Wide Open Spaces Adventure

Back to the Mogollon Rim for us this weekend! This time it was to the town of Heber/Overgaard, with a side quest to look at some property for sale. (No, we’re not in the market to buy land, but we can dream, right?)

We stopped at the Mogollon Rim Visitor Center. 

This time, we could see the views.

And yes, I found my husband out on a rock outcropping again!

We checked out the property (but not too much since we didn’t want to take the car too far down the gravel road). Lots of scrub brush, some free range cattle, and not too many bigger trees. There were wide open spaces, however. It was quiet, and cool (74 when it was going to be over 100 at home).

We passed through the boardwalk at Heber/Overgaard, but it wasn’t like my husband remembered, more hair salons than cool shops. It was too early for lunch, so we headed back down the hill, narrowly missing all the traffic headed back down the hill from the ASU football scrimmage at Camp T. (We didn’t know that as today, but had both worn maroon ASU shirts. Go figure!)

Maybe this wasn’t our greatest adventure, but it gave us some space. (The drive was about two and a half hours each way.) And sometimes we just need that.

*Spoiler alert: After all that driving, we found out the land we were on was actually US forest land, and not for sale. The maps just didn't take us to the right place!

The Sourdough Report:

Originally, I planned to pack breakfast and lunch for us. Then we decided to eat breakfast at home and get lunch out. In the end, we ended up back home with food I’d prepped: 

Sourdough gozleme and red peppers, cheese sticks, chocolate sourdough brownie bites and ginger soda 

And that’s it! Another Arizona adventure in the books!

What We Cooked and Ate (Week 32)

This Week's Eats:

Banana bread protein overnight oats (Fit Mama Real Food)

BBQ chicken foil packs (Budget Bytes)

Best sourdough banana muffins (The Pantry Mama)

Chocolate sourdough brownie bites (The Pantry Mama)

Ginger soda (Acres & Aprons)

Grilled corn on the cob in the husk (Kitchen Treaty)

Sourdough gozleme (The Pantry Mama)

Noteworthy Repeats:

Big-batch Instant Pot white beans (Epicurious)

Egg bake casserole (Food 52)

Sourdough gravy (The Pantry Mama)

Freezer Pull-Outs:

Sourdough chocolate zucchini muffins (The Pantry Mama)

Sourdough bread

Sourdough zucchini bread (The Pantry Mama)

Spinach pancakes (Rooted at Heart)

Mesa Parks Adventure

We visited (almost) all the parks in mesa! It started in January 2025 as an excuse to drive our new car around. Then it became a good low cost (but fun!) date activity. And then it became an adventure to get to all 90 parks in our city. As we went along, we changed the confines of our quest, eliminating some of the aquatic and recreation centers, as well as all of the basins. Last week, we concluded our exploration with park number 80. We got to see a great bit of our city, and we learned some things along the way.

Despite being in the desert, our city has done a pretty good job of preserving land. I am not sure how the city manages to keep all the grass mowed, but I didn't see any park that was completely unkempt. (Based on what I see at the park near us, I hypothesize that the city contracts out for park care, but I cannot be sure.) Yes, some of the parks shelter some houseless people, but for the most part, they remain useable to the public. Props to the city for that.

It is easy to see which parks are older and newer, based on the park signs. Some parks still have the ancient Mesa signs. Some have the newer signs. I wonder if they will ever change all of them.

We don't think that aquatic centers and recreation centers should count as parks. Resources, yes. Parks, no. But when the summer relegates us inside, maybe these centers become the equivalent of parks? We did see people out at the parks at many hours of the day and evening.

Many parks do not have restrooms. This probably helps with upkeep. It is good to know when planning things like a picnic, though.

All in all, we enjoyed this pursuit. While the parks were our goal, we benefitted from the time spent together and learning more about our city. And as an aside a little bit of a house snob, I think I enjoyed seeing the homes around the parks almost as much as, or more than, the parks themselves.

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Readers, what quests have you taken on? Have you completed them yet? Please share in the comments!

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And if anyone cares, yes, our final park run was fueled by sourdough:

Sourdough zucchini bread (The Pantry Mama) and sourdough zucchini muffins [with cheese + chives] (The Pantry Mama) for breakfast, and a refreshing dinner of sourdough zucchini slice (The Pantry Mama) and a riff on this skinny chicken salad from The Savvy Spoon made with green pepper and onion for the veggies.

Real Life Marriage: What If?

"What if we met sooner?" I grew up hearing my dad ask my mom this question. After my husband and I got married, we started asking it, too.

"What if we had met in high school?" Would we have liked each other? "What if we met in our twenties?" Would it have worked?

Then there are the other, "What if's?" "What if my husband had gone to college in Washington?" Would he have ever moved back to Arizona? "What if I had stayed in Arkansas?" Would we have ever met?

We could, "What if?" all day long, but I am convinced that everything happened as it should. I was very caught up with myself in high school, and was definitely not emotionally, mentally, or spiritually healthy enough to get into a serious relationship. Saving faith in Jesus was a must-have for me, and my husband did not find that until later in life (but before we met, because we met at church!) My husband was not ready to go to college right after high school, and learned a lot of other skills by going straight into the workforce. I wanted and needed to move back to Arizona for some healing in my family relationships, things that needed to heal so I could be in a better position to get married. "Yet God has made everything beautiful for its own time. He has planted eternity in the human heart, but even so, people cannot see the whole scope of God’s work from beginning to end," the author of Ecclesiastes writes (New Living Bible, 2015, Ecclesiastes 3:11). I could not agree more.

I really and truly believe that God brought my husband I together at the right time. We had pretty much stopped looking for people to date, after all. But God knew. He was preparing us. He was ordered all our steps aright. We trust Him to continue to work, even as we walk forward together into a life full of future, "What if's?"

Reference:

New Living Bible. (2015). Bible gateway. https://www.biblegateway.com/versions/New-Living-Translation-NLT-Bible/

Evening Roosevelt Lake Adventure

What do you do when it's nearly 110 degrees outside? Go to the lake! And not just any lake, the largest lake that exists solely within the Arizona state borders: Roosevelt Lake. I truly had no idea how big this lake was, until we drove, and drove, and drove, and still found more water (and that even with water levels being way down).

We set out from home about 3:30 PM and arrived at the lake around 5:00 PM. First, we went to the Roosevelt Bridge overlook. From the overlook, we saw the bridge (the longest of its kind in North America), a wide view of the lake, and plenty of boats! 

From there, we worked our way around to the dam overlook. (Beware, the road is barely wide enough for two cars). The dam is truly immense, and the buildings beneath it sparked our curiosity. We saw what we are pretty sure was a bald eagle land on one of the sandbars behind the dam.

After driving a bit more, we settled on one of the many recreational sites, Cottonwood Cove Picnic Area, for dinner. We looked out over the water, watched a storm roll in, and even spotted a javelina! On the way home, we drove through Miami, Superior, and Gold Canyon, and even caught up to rain storm (or it caught us)!

Could we have done other things with our evening? Sure! But this was a great way to get away, see some new scenery, and reset and refresh before the week starts again.

Curious about the sourdough? Dinner was elevated PBJs (elevated because I made the raspberry chia seed jam, upped the nutrition with Creamy protein peanut butter and put in all on sourdough sandwich bread). 

What We Cooked and Ate (Week 31)

This Week's Eats:

Banana zucchini overnight oats (Hummusapien)

Carrot cake sourdough muffins (The Pantry Mama)

Creamy dill potato salad (The Country Cook)

Quick raspberry chia seed jam (Food by Mars)

Sourdough sandwich bread (The Pantry Mama)

Southwest egg roll in a bowl (Meal Prep in an Instant)

Vegetable frittata (Meal Prep in an Instant)

Noteworthy Repeats:

Big-batch Instant Pot white beans (Epicurious)

Creamy protein peanut butter (Cheat Day by Design)

Egg bake casserole (Food 52)

Freezer Pull-Outs:

Sourdough blueberry muffins (The Pantry Mama)

Sourdough chocolate zucchini muffins (The Pantry Mama)

Sourdough bread

Sourdough zucchini bread (The Pantry Mama)