Life was racing along faster than I could keep up. I was literally running about 40 miles a week training for my marathon. I drank coffee more often than before. (I said it was to help my running, and it was, but I also indulged frequently to survive things like a two-day weekend work training.) I was scrolling incessantly, numbing out with movies and TV (often scrolling while doing so), eating tons of sugar, etc., etc. I needed/wanted a break. So I tried to cut it all/most of it out. I hoped it would be a "dopamine detox" of sorts, resetting my brain so that I could enjoy life again.
The Fasts
My husband had been telling me for awhile that I could reduce stress by cooking the same meals. Apparently I didn't understand what he said, but nonetheless, I picked a menu and decided to make it...for eight weeks. I called it a "capsule" meal plan, and it kind of bugged me, but by the end, I had gotten used to it. I was used to constantly searching for new recipes (either in my cookbooks, or on blogs), and finding the ingredients for them. It was fun, and a hobby, but also a stressor. Initially, I stopped reading my favorite cooking blogs, but then I decided to keep doing so. I just told myself I couldn't look up recipes for things I wanted to make. Maybe that was a cop-out, but that's what I did.
At first, the monotony of our menus bothered me. I was used to frequent variety and I missed it. But I did find a few ways to change things up (eg different versions of the black beans and rice and sheet pan pancakes). I came to really like the sourdough discard oatmeal bake (and think I might actually continue to make it). I enjoyed the treat of salmon burgers on Fridays, and somehow managed to still like pizza after having it every weekend. Eventually food became food, less exciting, but sustaining, which is ultimately what it needs to be.
Eating the same things did decrease decision fatigue. [Read Kelsey Wharton's (2026) piece about that here.] While I am not sure if it saved us any money (probably, but I didn't track that), it did decrease the variety of what I needed to buy at the store. I "missed" sales, but we survived. (I normally also try to cook around what is on sale.) I learned the art of batch cooking (meaning our freezer was always full). While it is not something I usually like to do (because I crave variety), it did reduce work overall. Near the end of Lent, my husband told me that though I took this challenge a little beyond what he intended (is anyone surprised?), it worked. He suggested a greater variety of meals if we do this again in the future.
I quit chocolate and coffee and sugar. I fast from chocolate during most Lenten seasons, and while I occasionally craved it, it was not so bad. I actually missed coffee a lot more than I expected, though. I like having it before runs with my collagen. I also occasionally wanted it as a "little treat" while at work. I had to say, "No" every time if I wanted to keep my fast. I remembered once again that quitting sugar means not eating out. (Because sugar is a flavor enhancer, it is is everything). That was a bummer, but we are trying to save money, so it helped us in that way.
I mostly kept of social media. (More on that here.) Occasionally, I found myself scrolling Facebook. I did scroll other things. I did not miss Instagram as much as I expected, but I did find myself wondering if I was missing out. I found my life smaller and quieter, but I also lacked social awareness and connection. [My husband was the one to tell me about the half-marathon debacle (Dotson, 2026).] Is there a balance to be found in being online versus off?
After reading John Mark Comer's (2019) book, The Ruthless Elimination of Hurry, I dreamed of chill Saturday evenings sitting around eating pizza and reading. Due to our remodel project, our Saturdays were not all chill, but I did really enjoy the variety of activities in which my husband and I engaged: playing some of our old (and new to me!) games, taking evening walks around downtown, crocheting and knitting while listening to episodes of The Song Exploder (Hirway, 2014-Present). I think I would like to incorporate some slower Saturdays into our lives in the future.
The Effects
At some point during Lent, my husband asked me why I had to give up so much stuff. (I was complaining about the lack of variety in my life.) I told him that I had not intended to, but these were the things that came to me. Yes, I can go too hard on things (okay, most things), but as I was reminded at the Ash Wednesday service, Lent is about finding true satisfaction in the Lord. When I was wanting things on my fasting list, I tried to pray to find satisfaction in God and remind myself that He is always my sustainer.
Living a "simpler" life did highlight the colors and delights of life more (rather than everything being in a technicolor wash of fast-paced living). Sometimes, I found that clearing things out helped me notice and name little things that bugged me and decide if I could do anything about them. Before, I think I had just been covering them up with layers and layers of dopamine seeking.
I suppose I should see cooking as hobby, a get-to versus a have-to. I have to feed us, but I don’t have to cook. I could blow all of our money on convenience or restaurant food. And I could make the same bare bones meals (which didn’t even happen during Lent), but I wouldn’t enjoy it. I need to try to keep a fresh perspective on cooking as a privilege.
As some side benefits of Lent, I had wondered if eating so much sugar via Pop-Tarts was making my face break out. Well, on zero processed sugar I was still having breakouts, some more painful than before. It could be a blood sugar issue (but I would think less so now eating more fat), but it’s not a sugar issue. Whole food eating also did not seem to impact my hunger any differently than processed food eating (despite what people might say to the contrary). I don't plan to go whole-hog back to eating as many Pop-Tarts as I was during peak marathon training, but I needn't think they are the sole cause of other health complaints.
In things I did not expect, there was the missing coffee. There was also the volume of food we went through. With limited ingredients, we needed a lot of them! With cheese in almost every meal (which I figured could help make this fast easier on my cheese-loving husband), our total cheese totals consumed each week totaled a pound or two. I quickly ran through my freezer stash and had to send my husband out to buy more when the bags went on sale. (I think we spent close to $50 on cheese that day!). I also used oatmeal and rice and black beans at higher quantities. Thankfully availability was not an issue, but I did need to rethink my grocery lists. And I thought that this challenge would be easier. In some ways, it was, but in some ways, it just moved the cheese...literally!
After Thoughts
I didn't really detox from dopamine this Lent. Maybe I just had less/realized what a junkie I am. Am I glad I did these fasts? Yes? No? I don't know. I think fasting is a discipline, an exercise, not necessarily one I like, but one that teaches me things. Now is the time to cut the fast so as to avoid falling into asceticism. While I cannot keep such strict policies of abstinence year-round, perhaps this (relative) one can help me appreciate more and over-indulge less. We will see. Now I enter back into the fray and pray to remember what I have learned.
References:
Comer, J.M. (2019). The ruthless elimination of hurry: How to stay emotionally healthy and spiritually alive in the chaos of the modern world. WaterBrook.
Dotson, K. (2026, March 4). What went wrong in the women’s competition at the chaotic USATF half marathon championship? CNN. https://www.cnn.com/2026/03/04/sport/usatf-half-marathon-chaos-what-went-wrong
Hirway, H. (Host). (2014-Present). The song exploder. [Audio podcast]. https://songexploder.net/
Wharton, K. (2026, January 15). Eating an everyday menu (most days). Rising Shining. https://risingshining.substack.com/p/eating-an-everyday-menu-most-days
No comments:
Post a Comment