Something New

Last week was emotionally exhausting. I announced to my coworkers and friends, my Arkansas family for the last 10 years, that I will be leaving and moving back home to Arizona at the end of June. I made this decision of my own free will, but it has been hard nonetheless.


I have always wanted to go back to Arizona. I have been working on my counseling licensure for awhile now. (See The List.) I thought I would leave my current job when I had an exciting new counseling position, maybe in Arizona, or maybe in Arkansas, or maybe somewhere else. The truth is that I don't have a job lined up all.
I believe this is the right decision. I feel drawn back to Arizona for reasons I cannot even explain. But let's be honest. I'm scared. I'm leaving my job, my friends, my church, my community, my independence, and in a lot of ways, the identity I've established for myself. I don't know what is next. All I know is that I have a place to live thanks to my parents.


Second Corinthians 5:7 says, "We live by faith, not by sight," but that's way easier said than done. I like to rely on my plans and my abilities to carry out those plans, but this move is forcing me to totally rely on God. I am excited to see how God will work, and I know He will but right now I'm waiting. I'm wondering. I'm saying goodbyes. My heart is already aching. Arkansas is so special to me! But God has made it pretty clear that it is time for something new.