Real Life Marriage: Telling My Husband What to Do

My husband asked me for a list of things to do. I had tried giving him lists before and they hadn't worked, but he asked for one this time, so I gave it to him. To my surprise, he actually completed it. And then he asked for another list the next day.

Lists are my thing. I like them...for me. It kind of stinks to have to give my husband a list of things to do, though. There is something within me that resists giving him lists because I feel like a school mistress giving her pupils homework. But hey, if this works, and this is what it looks like to share the household load, so be it.

The only other alternatives to giving my husband a list of things to do are to do all the things myself (which results in me either feeling bitter, or melting down, often both) or expect him to remember the things to do and constantly nag him (also ineffective). My husband tells me that if I give him a list of things to do, maybe he will eventually learn the daily tasks. Maybe, maybe not, but it's worth a shot.

We've been at this sharing household duties thing for a while now, and I must say, we are still pretty bad at it. I do not communicate as much as I should. I don't communicate as clearly as I should. I still make way too many decisions on my own, and I would still like my husband to initiate more tasks himself. But a few things are going better, so maybe the lists have helped.