What Do I Want More?

There are a lot of things in life that I want. Those things take resources: time, money, relationship investment, etc. Conversely, there are a lot of things that I don't want to do, but that lead to something I do want. In both scenarios, I have to ask, "What do I want more?"

When it comes to limited resources, I have to prioritize. There is enough time...for everything that is priority. I can do anything, but not everything. So sometimes I have to choose if I want to go for that run, or sleep. Sometimes I have to choose if I want to make a fancy dinner, or just eat simply so I can do something else. I have to decide if I want down time, or people time. With the time I have, what do I want most?

Money does not grow on trees, I mean the paper does, but the money doesn't. I can't just reach out and pick it. This is why we budget. We try to direct our money, first toward what we need (housing, food, utilities, etc.), and then toward what we want. We even have budget categories for our own wants, one for each of us individually, a vacation fun, and a date night fund. When times are scarce, those categories get less (or no) money, but when we can, we contribute. Even then, we have to decided what we want to do more with the money, because it is not endless.

There are lots of lovely people in the world, but not time to be close to them all. I also have a spouse. When it comes down to limited time and energy, what do I want more? A close marriage? Close friends? A lot of friends? Sometimes with people, the answer is not clear cut. Still, I have to ask, "What do I want more?"

Some things in life take work, too. I don't often want to clean the house, but I want the house to be tidy. I don't want to cook a ton of food on Friday for meal prep, but I want to eat during the week. I don't want to get up early to fuel before I run, but I'll feel better if I do. For that matter, I don't always want to work hard in training for my races, but I benefit if I do. In those hard moments, I have to ask myself what I really want more.

Asking, "What do I want more?" pertains to faith, too. Following God is rarely easy. Do I want my will, or his will? In my marriage, do I want my way, or God's way? When it comes to my work, do I want to do what I think, or what the Spirit tells me? Do I want disobedience or obedience more? Maybe a better question is, "What does God want more?"

I can't have it all. What do I want more? What more is right in this season might not be right in the next. I need wisdom. I need God's wisdom. Ultimately, I want His more for my life, and that requires continually asking for and seeking it.