Tuesday, April 30, 2024

Everything I Read in April

I set a goal to read seven books this month. I knew this was possible, given that I read at least two books at week last year. Midway through the month, I realized that this goal was NOT happening on its own, so I developed a new strategy: I had to read at least a book a week, and that meant dividing how ever many pages the book had by seven and getting those pages read! I did somewhat "cheat" (or take the easy way out) to meet my goal, as the last two books I picked to read to get to my goalwere only about 100 Libby pages each. I did not know that when I checked them out to read, but it worked in my favor. (I also ended up returning to a quick fiction read between them because, well, I was tired of nonfiction!) I will argue that since I read several very long books, it was only fair to add a few shorter, easier reads to meet my goal this month. Anyway, here is my list:

18) Breaking Free From Body Shame: Dare to Reclaim What God Has Named Good by Jess Connolly —I have seen many Christian women post about this book. I have followed Jess Connolly on social media for some time, after having read, Wild and Free. This book surpassed all the expectations I had for it, in spite of my exposure to media about it. More about flat out shame than about the body, this is a freedom call to women, encouraging them to live out the good God has put in them, to worship God in their bodies, to repent, and to bring about revival in the land. Connolly does a great job portraying the nuances of a just and righteous God with a loving and gracious one, and it hits home. God is good, and we can live out of and for that goodness. Amen and amen!

19) 168 Hours: You Have More Time Than You Think by Laura Vanderkam—I started reading this book after seeing the 168 hours concept referenced in one two many other books I had read (eg Loving My Actual Life and Life Reimagined). In the beginning, the book really rankled me, to the point that I started, and finished, reading another book first. Then I decided to get back to this one. There is certainly a point that this book is at Maslow's level of self-actualization. People in developing countries and other forms of poverty do not really have time to categorize their 168 hours and learn to manage them better. Still, I did glean some things from this. I have choices. If I choose to do housework, it is really a hobby (since, technically, I could hire it out—if I wanted to, but also, if I could afford it, which is another discussion). Multi-tasking is switch-tasking, which wastes time. In the end, a good summary of the question this book leaves readers with is that of Mary Oliver, "Tell me, what is it you plan to do. With your one wild and precious life?” Perhaps those of us in first-world countries could do more than we are. It is a thought at least worth giving a little time to ponder.

20) An Uncertain Inheritance: Writers on Caring For Family Edited by Nell Casey—A collection of essays on caring, and being cared for, this book is a tender testament to the fragility of life. Written by authors from many walks of life, this book covers care for many types of people: aging parents, partners, children with special needs, and even self. In a nation that touts independence and strength, this is a testament to the need for and benefits of care, uncertain a process as it may be.

21) The Theft of Memory: Losing My Father One Day at A Time by Jonathan Kozol—An account of Psychiatrist Dr. Harry Kozol's battle with Alzheimer's disease, and his son's care for him during that 14 year period, this is a timely memoir about memory and the inability of the loss of it to truly steal a person's entire humanity. Dr. Kozol realized he was slipping, and eventually he had to live in a care home, for his safety and for the well-being of his wife, but in the end, he outlived his wife, living until 102 and leaving in his wake a legacy of good patient care and prolific scientific writing. This is a sweet book to read for those caring for ailing parents now, or for those who do so in the future. Decidedly non-Christian/non-religious, it still has something to offer in terms of detailing the end of a life well lived and not taken too soon.

22) How to Have a Good Day: Harness the Power of Behavioral Science to Transform Your Working Life by Caroline Webb—This was quite a tome, and at the same time, not too hard to read. About working life, this book incorporates anecdotes, psychoeducation about cognitive biases, and practical ideas about how to use the deliberate mind instead of the “defend” mind. With tips and tricks for working with people and tending to tasks like e-mails, this book has a little bit of something for everyone. At least a skim read, or topical read might be good for many.

23) Gift from the Sea by Anne Morrow Lindbergh—What a delightful, and poignant read! Written in 1955 by the wife of famed aviator Charles Lindbergh during a solo trip to the beach, this collection of essays is as timely now as it was then. In each essay, the author describes a shell from the beach, and what it teaches her about being a woman, wife, and mother. She touches on the demands of these roles; the need for moments of stillness, freedom, and creativity, and the ebbs and flows of these characteristics in relationships. She writes of herself as a feminist, yet she must be an old wave feminist, because she speaks highly of marriage and of the great need for men and women to work together. She writes of busyness and the need to stay present. Truly, this book is a timeless gift, one that even Lindbergh’s daughter says she rereads every time she goes to the beach, even 50 years after the book’s first publishing. I might consider re-reading it in the future as well.

24) Mending the Doctor's Heart by Tina Radcliffe—Dr. Sara Elliott has been on the run for some time: from her father's expectations, a failed relationship, etc. Dr. Ben Rogers is running, too, trying to avoid swamping grief. Both find themselves in Paradise, Colorado vying for the same job. As in many romance novels, they expectedly fall for each. There are some plot twists I did not expect, however. There are also some poignant messages about selflessness and self-sacrifice, and a note that forgiveness, both of self and others, "is an act of faith." Yes, the book may be cliche in its beginning and end, but this meat in the middle is heart medicine, and for that reason, worth the read.

25) What to Do When You Don’t Know What to Do: 8 Principles for Finding God’s Way by Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend—A short and concise book, with contents that are not necessarily earth-shattering, this could still be a resource for people lost in the muddle of life and seeking God's way out. With brief chapters, real-life stories, and highlighted quotes, this is easy to read. It is decidedly Christian, however, and would be of most use to those who understand what true saving faith means.

26) Searching for Sunday: Loving, Leaving, and Finding Church by Rachel Held Evans—Long ago, I read Held's book, A Year of Biblical Womanhood about her experience trying out biblical practices of being a woman (especially the Old Testament ones). In this memoir/expose, Evans explores her evangelical upbringing, church disillusionment, leaving church, and seeking to find it again. With stats and Scriptures, Held shows a lot of ways that the church is failing Christians, or making it hard for believers to stay in church. After all the pain she experiences, however, in the end, she concludes, “I can’t be a Christian on my own. Like it or not, following Jesus is a group activity, something we’re supposed to do together.” While I cannot get behind everything Evans believed (she has since passed away), I think that this is a valuable read for believers seeking to understand the deconstructing/exvangelical/dechurched (whatever we are calling it) movement.

Monday, April 29, 2024

The Simplified Life (Month 4)


After months of working at this, I do not think I am actually going to get to a simplified life, or even a minimalist life. I just want to simplify so that I can enjoy the life I have. I continue to work towards that goal.

In Our Home:

I go through spurts of getting rid of stuff. For now, I am piling it up to donate. I try not to contemplate items once I remove them. If I get nostalgic, I will want them back.

I recently weeded out and donated more paper books to our little free library. As a general rule, I now read e-library books. Paper books are great, but they require carrying, which means I read them less. Paper books I keep take up space at home. We have a small home, so I need to keep paring down, rather than building up. My library is one area in which that is fairly easy to do.

In the Kitchen:

I continue to try to pare down my pantry stores. I am realizing that, since I always like making new recipes, staples need to be minimal. No use stocking up on stuff I do not know I will use. Eggs, flour, milk, fruit, those I will use. Other stuff, I need to buy as I go.

While I like to make special breakfasts on the weekend, that has not been in the cards lately. What has been in the cards is Reese's mixes. Yes, mixes. My husband really likes Reese's chocolate, and we have been on a mission to try each and every new Reese's product. Since Reese's now makes breakfast coffee cake and muffin mixes, that has been the recipe for weekend breakfasts.

As I empty out pantry stores, I am discovering that I have too many storage receptacles. (Think the Costco peanut butter jars that are great for storage, until there are 12 empties lined up on the counter.) Therefore, I tossed some of the empties. I can also save more if I really need them.

I was making and freezing halves of recipes, to give us variety. At this point, that is just more work. If the pasta recipe feeds us for five days straight, no bother. I just won't cook for the week. Maybe this is not ideal, but it is working for us right now.

In the Realm of Personal Goals:

Having multiple goals was not working for me. Each month, I pick three things to work on, and I just have to let the rest go. I am also working to make SMART goals: specific, measurable, attainable, relevant, and time-bound (Boorgard, 2023). This month, I wanted to read seven books. That was not happening organically, so I moved to dividing the book's pages between the days of the week. Seven-hundred pages? Read 100 pages a day. It is not great to have to set goals like that, but they work.

Pat's Run went great, but I know I cannot do all the things. While I would like to run longer or do more workouts sometimes, I have to fit exercise into the time I have. If I run late getting out the door to start m exercise routine, that means I run shorter. I win some. I lose some.

In Relationships:

I stopped sending birthday cards about two years ago. I like celebrating people's birthdays, but writing is hard for me with my dystonia, so I stopped. I send texts or e-mails instead. A time has progressed, I have sent less and less snail mail. I send, "Thank you," texts or e-mails. I let gift messages sent with gifts be the cards. Hopefully people know I love and care about them. I'm just doing less.

My husband is getting ready to celebrate a big personal and professional accomplishment. I had big ideas, like taking photos and sending out announcements. None of that is happening. We are just celebrating with our parents and I purchased a special experience for him afterward. That is probably about all we will do.

Conclusion:

A simple life? I probably won't ever have it. I continue to work towards simplifying the life I have, though. I really do want to enjoy this one life God has given me to live!

Reference:

Boogard, K. (2023, December 26). How to write SMART goals. Atlassian. https://www.atlassian.com/blog/productivity/how-to-write-smart-goals

Saturday, April 27, 2024

What I Used/What I Used Up (Week 17)

What I Used of My Meal Plan-

Breakfasts:

Lunches:

Best breakfast sandwiches on cheddar and green onion biscuits (The Kittchen)
Carrot and romaine salads with shredded chicken (365 Days of Crockpot) and salsa

Creamy butternut squash oat soup (Oatrageoous Oatmeals)

Dinners:

Dill pickle and vidalia onion grilled cheese (4 Sons 'R Us)
Quick bolognese (Good Housekeeping Family Italian Cookbook)
Red wine pasta with ham and Parmesan (How Sweet Eats)
Smoky farro with peas 
(Easy Vegetarian Slow Cooker)

Snacks:

What I Used Up--

Freezer:

Two packages of bacon
Heels of bread
Three bags of frozen green beans
Red wine for cooking

Fridge:


Two cartons of eggs
Dill pickles
Green onions

Two heads of romaine lettuce
Shredded Parmesan cheese
Shredded sharp cheddar cheese


Pantry:


Canola oil

Cocoa

Farro

Ripe bananas

Old flour
Plastic wrap
One box of whole wheat spaghetti

What went bad:

The milk soured (but I am trying to use it up as such!)

What I Prepped for Next Week: 

Monday, April 22, 2024

Limits

Limits. Oh how I hate them, and how how a part of life they are! I had a conversation with a friend just the other day about limits and how neither of us can do what other people can do. We can resent that, or we can work on accepting it so that we can fully live the lives we have.

The Bible actually talks about limits in some positive ways. In the Psalms, David writes, "The boundary lines have fallen for me in pleasant places; surely I have a delightful inheritance" [Ps 16:6, New International Version (NIV)]. Pauls talks about how the Spirit intercedes for us when we lack the ability to find the words to pray (Rom 8:28). Paul talks about God's power being sufficient in weakness (2 Cor 12:9) about having "treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us" (2 Cor 4:7). In 1 Corinthians 12, Paul talks about differing gifts in the body (how we don't have them all, but that the body as a whole, functions together). All of these seem to point to limits being good, maybe not feeling good, but being for good.

How are limits good? Well, limits remind me that God knows better than I do. Limits teach me to be grateful to God for what He has done. As Kate Bowler says, "There's a lot to do if you have to save yourself" (Bowler, 2022). Praise Jesus, there is a Savior, and I am not Him! Limits teach me to rely on God's power instead of my own. Limits require others to exercise their unique gifts and talents because I certainly lack the many things that the church corporate needs. Limits require me to rest, something God in his perfection did, but that I in all my human weakness struggle to do. I guess what I am saying is that limits are good for for the building of my spiritual character, for my sanctification.

I still don't like limits, but what if I thanked God for my limits instead of resenting them? What if I learned to appreciate them for what they are, a tool to bring me closer to Jesus. I want that result, even if it's uncomfortable. So here's to limits. To acknowledging, and even embracing them. To maybe fighting against them a little less, because if I could fight them less, I might grow more within them, and thereby pursue the full life that God has for me. Amen and amen.

References:

Bowler, K. (Host). (2022, October 24). More life, fewer explanations. (S9, E8) [Audio podcast episode]. In Everything Happens. https://katebowler.com/podcasts/more-life-fewer-explanations-2/

New International Version. (2011). Bible Gateway. https://www.biblegateway.com/versions/New-International-Version-NIV-Bible/

Saturday, April 20, 2024

What I Used/What I Used Up (Week 16)

 

What I Used of My Meal Plan-

Breakfasts:

Lunches:

Carrot and romaine salads with shredded chicken (365 Days of Crockpot) and salsa

Dinners:

BBQ pulled pork grilled cheese with fresh guacamole (Oh Sweet Basil)
Dill pickle chicken salad (Fit Foodie Finds) on light brioche buns (Lite Cravings)
Pickle grilled cheese sandwich (Tao of Spice)
Pulled pork grilled cheese sandwich (Girl Heart Food)

Snacks:

What I Used Up--

Freezer:

Blueberries
One bag frozen broccoli
Frozen corn
Diced onion
Dried apples
Dried cantaloupe
Dorot basil cubes
Corn
Grated ginger
Light brioche buns (Lite Cravings)
One pound of ground beef
Milk
Spiced lentils with carrots (Budget Bytes) and brown rice (Add a Pinch)
Sweet potato crust quiche (Fit Foodie Finds) with Instant Pot caramelized onions (The Culinary Gym)
Protein banana muffins (Fit Foodie Finds)
Pulled pork
Sprouted almonds (Rise and Run)
Whipping cream

Fridge:


Old bag of carrots
Cream cheese
One bag of Parmesan cheese

Red apples

Pantry:


Two cans crushed tomatoes
Crystal Light tea mix
Dried cranberries
Lentils

One box whole wheat linguini

One can of tomato paste

What went bad:

Nothing that I know of yet!

What I Prepped for Next Week: 

Creamy butternut squash oat soup (Oatrageoous Oatmeals)

Shredded chicken (365 Days of Crockpot


What I Froze for Future Me:





Presto pesto (Rise and Run)




Red wine for cooking


Remaining tomato paste


Wednesday, April 17, 2024

Heartbreak

Heartbreak hurts. Caring about someone or something only to lose it or have it taken away is exceedingly painful. Yet heartbreak is good in that it shows the ability of the heart, that it can care. Heartbreak can also show what is in the heart, though, and that can be good, or bad.

Heartbreak tends to reveal the best and worst of people. It binds together, or it divides. It shows strength of character, or it shows the utter depravity of man. Heartbreak is so painful that it seems there are few in-betweens, only the extremes.

Heartbreak is also an opportunity, though. It is a chance to shore up weak vessels, to strengthen resources, to deeply soak up what really matters. Anne Lamott tells the following story in her book, Further Thoughts on Faith, and it has stuck with me. “There's a lovely Hasidic story of a rabbi who always told his people that if they studied the Torah," she writes, "it would put Scripture on their hearts."

"One of them asked, 'Why on our hearts, and not in them?'"

"The rabbi answered, 'Only God can put Scripture inside. But reading sacred text can put it on your heart, and then when your hearts break, the holy words will fall inside.'"

I don't like heartbreak any more than the next person, but what if I saw it as an opportunity: not just to see "the real me," but to soak up the good stuff, to soak up God's love and grace and wisdom and healing. I don't want to pursue heartbreak just for this sake, but since it's bound to come to me, why don't I look for God in it? Why don't I study the Scriptures that tell me of God more? Why don't I ask for and even invite God to come in?

Heartbreak, sooner or later, comes for all of us. We can decide what to do with our broken hearts, though. We can decide how we tend to them, with the medicine of the world, or the medicine of The Word. May we make the best choice, for God's glory and our good. Amen!

Reference:

Lamott, A. (2000). Traveling mercies: some thoughts on faith. First Anchor Books edition. New York, Anchor Books, a division of Random House, Inc.

Monday, April 15, 2024

Pat's Run 5.0


I felt a bit underprepared coming into this race. I had a great half-marathon in February, but put in very little speed work in preparation for it. [My goal was to run long, and per Mary Johnson (2024), you can run long, or run fast, not both]. I took a week off running more than a mile a day after the half-marathon, ran easy for the next two weeks, and then started a six week faster 5K plan (Luff, 2023). I think that plan was a bit ambitious. Speed work twice a week felt hard, and I found it difficult to hit paces. I noticed my HRV dipping several times, and not recovering for days, up to a week, but I soldiered on.

My schedule race week was not ideal. Our car went down Sunday. That led to extra stress, and an extra long work day Monday as I added use of the light trail to commute to and from my office. Work duties of all kinds swamped my husband. I did try to get good sleep, and mostly succeeded in staying in bed for seven hours each night. I did not necessarily sleep well, though. 

On the food front, I ate things that I knew could irritate my stomach, and they did. (I simply couldn't figure out a better meal plan, so I went with what I had.) I did decide to take vitamin C and zinc daily, as I heard on a podcast that vitamin C one to two weeks before a race can reduce incidences of illness in runners (Samuels, 2024). Whether it helped or not, I do not know, but I made it through the week healthy. Praise the Lord! I ate pasta for dinner the night before the race and I stuck with my typical nightcap of pancake/banana/hot cocoa. Still, my stomach felt off the morning of the race.

Goals

I set ambitious goals for this year's Pat's Run. I wanted to PR. If that wasn't possible, I wanted to at least get close to my time from two years ago. And if I could, I wanted to spot and get a picture with fourth place US Olympic Trials finisher Jess Tonn McClain

For reference: here are my times and the weather conditions for my last four races:

April 15, 2023: Bib 3321 8:12/mile, 34:26 85 degrees
April 23, 2022: Bib 2200 8:23/mile 35:14 81 degrees
April 27, 2019: Bib 3846 8:21/mile 35:06 96 degrees
April 22 2017: Bib 12507 9:14/mile 38:47 94 degrees

With warm temperatures forecast, reaching my A goal would be tough.

Packet Pick-up


I somehow got a 1327 bib number this year! Maybe because I ran fast last year? Maybe because I registered for the race right after running last year's race? Whatever the case, I took the low bib! It put me in corral 2, the number which they put on the front of the bibs this year (helpful, since the corral system is a bit confusing). Packet pickup, or at least the packet pickup parking lot was very busy Friday. Actual pickup was a breeze. In and out. 

Race Day


I got up at 4 am, puttered around the house for a bit, and sensing that my stomach was still off, chewed some papaya enzymes and drank 8 ounces of cold water. I climbed my stairs five times for a warmup, and off we went to catch the 5:15 am light rail! The light rail station was a bit sketchy, but seeing other runners in their Pat's Run shirts on the light rail increased my race excitement.

The race expo opened at 6 am. We picked up a few things, the best of which was this magsafe charger my husband convinced me to get. I did not want to give away my information for the required survey and used his, so it's his gadget, but a useful one, he says! I did see Jess Tonn McClain, but I was too shy to go up to her, despite my husband's urgings to do so.

Warm-Up


I jogged for five minutes about 40 minutes before race start time, and then ate my banana and drank another 8 ounces of water. I made another bathroom stop. (The more I run, the more. learn to embrace using porta-potties.) Then into my corral I went. Earlier corral placement meant not only less runners to weave through as I ran, but also cooler temperatures. With the sun already up and highs of forecast for the day, I considered it a major blessing!

The Run


Miles one and two felt hard, and slow. My lungs burned. Seeing paces of 8:23-8:25 a mile made me think I would definitely not PR. I talked to myself in the third person and told myself to keep trying. (For some reason in my mind, I called myself by my maiden last name while doing so?) There is a hill someone around mile two, and when I came down the other side, I told myself to move. (I also worked to pick people off as I could. This is where I wished for a pacer.) Mile 3 came fairly quickly, and I felt better. I also saw that I had started running under 8:00/mile. I don't think I have ever run that fast for over a mile. Could I keep it up? If I could keep at it, I might be able to shave off those last few seconds of my mile per hour pace to get to a PR! I told myself not to count myself out. Jess Tonn McClain hadn't, despite being an unsponsored athlete at the US Olympic Trials. I too, could keep trying and keep going.

The last 0.2 miles of the race is uphill into the stadium. There is a pretty short, steep rise to get into the stadium, and then the downhill onto the grass. The race organizers covered the field with some kind of material, but the grass still felt squishy underfoot, especially after having run on the roads. I gave it my all, not even giving thought to trying to smile, as I usually like to do. I was working for this and if I grimaced, oh well!

Results


An agonizing part about this race is the late race results. With 27,000-28,000 runners, clock time is not chip time. The race websites are also slow to load afterward. I saw that my watch (started before the race, and stopped after the finish line) showed 8:08/mile, though, and felt very pleased with that. After I got home, I got the final results: 33:40 and 8:01/mile. Wow! Thank you Jesus! That is going to be hard to beat! I am getting older, though, and tomorrow, let alone next year are not guaranteed. I just wanted to rejoice in this run!

Final Thoughts


My husband got down on the field this year, which resulted in some cool shots of me coming across the finish lane. I did get back to Jess Tonn McClain's #LovePup booth just to catch her before she went out to run more. (She is the Olympics alternate, so has to stay in marathon shape.) The medals are pretty cool, magneting together with previous medals, for a series of three (to be finished next year), showing stages of Pat Tillman's journey.

This is/was a race, but ultimately it is about Pat Tillman and the ultimate sacrifice he made serving our country. This is an event that is about his family purposing their grief for the betterment of humanity. This is an event that is about community. I always smile seeing the many different types of people that wheel, walk and run this race. It's special!

Extra special this year is the 20th anniversary for the race. Maybe for that reason, the medals and race shirts are inArizona State University's maroon and gold colors. Given that this is my husband's graduation year, that feels extra special.

All in all, what I would say about Pat's Run this year is that itt was super special, super meaningful, poignant, even. Thank you, Lord, for the ability to run! Thank you Pat Tillman and all the other men and women who have given their lives to preserve the freedoms we have, including the ability to run. Thank you Pat Tillman Fund, Arizona State University, and race organizers, and the city of Tempe for a great event. Super special. Super meaningful. Thank you!

References:

Caplan, H. (2024, April 40). Lane 9 with run coach Mary Johnson, keeping the goal the goal. (no. 7) [Audio podcast episode]. In The Lane 9 podcast. https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-lane-9-podcast/id1208568777

Luff, C. (2023, July 6). 6 week intermediate 5K training schedule. Run for Good. https://run-for-good.com/6-week-intermediate-5k-training-schedule/

Samuels, H. (2024, February 23). Supplement myth busting series: Immune boosting supplements, do they actually do anything? [Audio podcast episode]. In Holley Fueled Nutrition podcast. https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/supplement-myth-busting-series-immune-boosting-supplements/id1525009621?i=1000646542973

Saturday, April 13, 2024

What I Used/What I Used Up (Week 15)

What I Used of My Meal Plan-

Breakfasts:

Lunches:

Cajun-stuffed bell peppers (Oatrageoous Oatmeals)
Carrot and romaine salads with shredded chicken (365 Days of Crockpot) and salsa
Easy egg salad (The Instant Pot Electric Pressure Cooker Cookbook)
French onion soup (The Instant Pot Electric Pressure Cooker Cookbook)
Progresso soup

Dinners:

Muenster grilled cheese (Build Your Bite)
Pulled pork and muenster grilled cheese (Bacon and Legs)
Spiced lamb ragu shells (Good Housekeeping Family Italian Cookbook)

Snacks:


Apples
Bananas
Carrots
Cheese sticks
Chili caramel Chex mix (How Sweet Eats)
Chocolate protein mousse (Fit Foodie Finds)
Hot chocolate
Leftover pancakes
Oatmeal in various forms
Peanuts
Protein puppy chow (Fit Foodie Finds)
Reese's peanut butter muffins

What I Used Up--

Freezer:

1 bag of store-bought broccoli
1 loaf of homemade bread
Old heels of homemade bread
Store-bought bread
Mashed banana
Muenster cheese

Fridge:

Chicken broth

1 dozen eggs carton
1/2 leftover pear
Roma tomato

Swiss cheese

Pantry:

Brown rice
Brown sugar

Cashews

Crystal Light iced tea packet

1 can Progresso soup
Ripe bananas
Box of rice pocket cereal

Salted peanuts

What went bad:

Nothing yet?

What I Prepped for Next Week: 


What I Froze for Future Me: