The Strong Woman

The United States of America has its first female vice president. Women continue to shatter "the glass ceiling" in the stock market, sports arena, and beyond. At the same time, a record number of women are leaving the workforce to stay home, at least in part due to the COVID-19 pandemic. If "the future is female," it seems we have two seemingly opposing forces at work: one working to promote female gender equality and the second pushing women "ten years back." But are these forces truly opposing? Does the furtherance of female equality really mean that all women need to break societal stereotypes and do great work in the marketplace? Or are there alternative narratives where women stay at home and have just as much inherent worth and value? I am here to suggest that there might be more than one way to be a strong woman.

I have seen many strong women in my life: my nana, my mother, female missionaries, etc. My nana had two bachelor's degrees, one in zoology, and one in Bible. My mother was a sharp-witted nurse who practiced impeccable care for tiny infants in the NICU. My nana blazed frontiers as a missionary. My mom provided healthcare for natives in outlying areas of a foreign country. I have known many females who lived most of their lives among indigenous people to provide medical care and bring the gospel to those who desperately needed it. I have been exposed to genius professors, women who worked while their husbands did the stay-at-home dad thing, female engineers, female marketeers, etc. Many of these women were married. Some were not. Some spent their entire lives in the marketplace. Some made the abrupt, and sometimes final decision to stay home. Some never went to work at all. The strength of these women existed not in their profession or position, but in how they lived.

I sense more and more in the cultural narrative these days an ultimatum for women to work AND care for their families. That this is what it means to be a strong women. Some women are "successful" at both endeavors. (I put "success" in quotes because the definition of success is really unique to the person.) Look at Sheryl Sandburg, for instance, who wrote a whole book about women and work. She writes about the tug-of-war between home and work, but shares about how she succeeded in both. Other women have written about the immensity of work left to women, and suggest talking to partners about how to balance the responsibility. I've read blogs from women who feel working makes them better mothers, and blogs from women who recognize that full-time working and mothering, or even wife-ing don't go together. Maybe culture needs to see that women are valuable and of equal worth whatever they decide to do with their time, whether at work, or in the home.

As a result of what I have seen, I would like to suggest that women have inherent worth, and that they have this worth whether or not they work outside the home. I believe that a strong woman is not one who breaks glass ceilings, but who searches her heart and is true to herself. For some, that means pursuing a career. For others, that means "sacrificing" a career to fulfill a calling to stay home and be the CEO of domestic duties and perhaps children. I don't believe that women have to have children to be valuable in stay-at-home or work pursuits, either. There is beauty in diversity, and I believe, a diversity in callings.

 In a nation that touts equality and demands tolerance, can we really say the future is female if we do not value all females in all their roles and all their places? I think not. All women are valuable. All women can be strong. The strength of women comes not from what they do or where they find themselves, but in who they are. Strength is a matter of heart, not position, and I hope society as a whole soon starts recognizing that.