Stages of Waiting

People talk about stages of grief, but what about stages of waiting? (Maybe there is some grief in there, too?). The anxiety, the prayer, the trying to make peace, the tiredness, and then maybe an answer, or not. As I endured yet another period of waiting, I was thinking more about all of these periods.

Scripture says not to be anxious, but I struggle with that. When I am waiting, my first response is to feel to feel on edge, to feel as if I cannot stand to wait for an answer. "Do not be anxious about anything," God's Word says, but I feel tense, impatient, and frustrated (English Standard Version, 2019, Philippians 4:6). Then I realize I missed what should be the first step on waiting.

So, I revert to what I should have done. I pray, fervently, often, sometimes begging, pleading, and demanding. I "by prayer and supplication...let [my] requests be made known to God (Phil 4:6). It is good to go to God with my requests, to be like the persistent widow (Luke 18). Demanding, however, is not a positive behavior. It is thinking I know better than God, and I certainly do not.

Then there is the praying to wait well. I have prayed for the thing. God knows. Then I need to wait, to learn, to watch.

As I watch, I wonder if God will surprise us, me. I begin to hope, maybe expect. But still no answer comes.

I try to start making peace with the process. I pray to accept whatever God has for us. I try to start finding contentedness in the here and now, even if nothing changes. "With thanksgiving" I try to make my requests known to God (Phil 4:6). It is hard, but all I can do at the moment.

Eventually, in my humanity, I grow weary. I just want an answer. But the Word says not to grow weary in doing good, and I need to wait well, for God's good, and my glory (Galatians 6:9). And that pretty much resets the cycle all over again.

Oh, the struggle it is to wait, and to wait well. So many stages. So many phases. How I need the Lord's help.

Reference:

English Standard Version. (2019). Bible Gateway. https://www.biblegateway.com/versions/English-Standard-Version-ESV-Bible/#copy