...for 30 days. I like running. It has served me well in a lot of ways. I've enjoyed completing many races. I've gotten faster and run longer distances in the past year. But I have also gotten really, really tired. I have an excessive, obsessive personality. I have run a lot, especially up until this last month. I was trying to outrun my stress. Trying to outrun problems. Trying to run to deal with COVID. Just running too much. So when all my spring races got cancelled, I figured it was time to take a break, not from exercise, but from running. So I found myself a 30 day plan and had at it. Here's what happened:
Day 1: I don't like the workout. I feel high anxiety, sadness, grief, and feelings of loss. I realize that it's hard to get to my 10,000 daily steps goal on my FitBit. I'm just as hungry as when I was running and didn't expect it.
Day 2: I am sore. The workout was better. I am less thirsty and less hungry, but feel bloated and swollen.
Day 5: I am getting into this a little more. I find I am less hungry at breakfast, more hungry at lunch, and just as hungry at snack, but I've switched to craving protein than carbs. Walking is getting to be too much. Should I give it up and start coverting workout minutes to steps?
Day 7: Finally! A rest day. I go for a walk and am even more hungry.
Day 8: Legs day. I am less hungry, and my Fit Bit says I've burned a lot less energy for the spite despite moving such a large muscle group.
Day 9: I feel bloated, weak, and tired. I don't like strength training very much.
Day 12: Easter. I really miss running. I usually like to celebrate with a run. Not this time.
Day 13: I like workout a little more, but I am also on the move more at work. So which is actually the cause of feeling good tired at the end of the day.
Day 14: I like the workout again. I skip my rest day to have two later? Finish early?
Day 16: I recognize that less hard workout days are good for me. That is one benefit of following a program. I am getting used to this life. I feel less bloated. My body feels more toned. I am only a little sore. I am figuring out ways to get my steps in most days.
Day 19: I complain about feeling tired. My husband notes that I seemed less tired when I was running. He suggests I go back to it. I tell him I'm waiting it out.
Day 24: Total body pyramid again. I hate pyramid workouts. Or do I? But I feel stronger than I remembered feeling the last time. I am using 10 pound weights for the most part now.
Day 25: I take a rest day to hike. I hike nearly seven miles despite not having even walked more than three miles in a row for many days. I am slightly surprised. My body can still do this!
Day 26: Three more days and a rest day. My heel hurts (from hiking, old shoes, ??). I'm tired of my daily 10 flights of stairs as my only running. Lord, help me be balanced when I go back. And may I not take running for granted.
Day 27: I definitely feel stronger, but two more workouts....I'm ready!
Day 29: Last day. (Remember that rest day I skipped? It's coming tomorrow.) I'm glad I'm done. I did okay, but this workout plan was too much, at least with daily walking added on top. I feel like I "need" cardio and sunshine. I know weights are good for me, but I may just do the minimum.
Day 30: Rest day walk. The end. I look forward to running tomorrow.
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In summary, I quit running for a time. It was hard, but as with all hard things, it got easier with time. I hope I don't have to quit running again, but I probably will, and now I know I can do it.
Quitting running showed me some things: that I get easily stir crazy. That I can obsess. That if I have to choose exercise, I prefer cardio outside (even if walking). That our bodies are resilient. (Now if I can manage not to overdo running and maybe, just maybe take a rest or "off" season.) Lord willing, back to the streets tomorrow. I'll update later....
There's a lot of judgment in the wellness world. Judgment for following certain plans and not following others. Judgement for using certain methods of measurement. Judgment for not using methods of measurement. I'm all for intuitive living, but sometimes it just doesn't work. I need some accountability and some help. And that's why I bought a FitBit. Okay, that's not the only reason why I bought the device. I will confess that some of my reasons were vain, and because of wants, but that's not what this post is about. This post is about how sometimes we help getting back in tune with our bodies and what's good for us.
It is no secret that I have a high stress job. I like my job, but it can get pretty intense at times. It can also cause me to sit for hours on end. I try to stand up when I work on my Microsoft Surface computer, but even that does not happen sometimes. I have been thinking about buying a FitBit for awhile, and when they went on sale the weekend of Black Friday two years ago, I did it. And I really haven't looked back.
What do I like about the FitBit?
Well at lot of things. I like that it logs steps. I like the fancy, "rise to wake" time feature (though it also annoys me because sometimes it doesn't work, and sometimes it works at the most inopportune times, like it a pitch black room when I'm trying to sneak about unnoticed.) I like the heart rate tracking feature. I like the auto-track for exercise. I like the accountability it gives me to get up and move every hour.
What don't I like about the FitBit?
The manufacturing! I got a crack in the face of my Charge 2 before the first year I used the FitBit. The company warrantied it, and gave me a new dongle, which I appreciated. But this year, less than a year into using that dongle, I got another crack. And the company warranty doesn't fix it. FitBit, please find a better manufacturing process. I like your product, but....
The app favors cardio workouts. Step goals are one thing, but strength training and even cross training have value. And the device doesn't give as much credit to those.
What features do I use?
I track workouts that aren't running (to give myself some credit, since the steps don't really add up for certain types of exercise--see above). I monitor my sleep via the app. (it helps keep me accountable, or at least lets me know why I feel tired.) I use the app as a period calendar (because the doctors always ask, "When was your last cycle?" and I don't remember!).
What features don't I use?
The stopwatch. The run tracker. (I prefer RunKeeper.) The guided breathing. The food tracker. (This is where intutive eating comes into play. I'm not really sure that calorie counter is right. And if I start from basal metabolism to "earn calories," it's depressing. But if I eat to keep up with the estimated calories, I can overeat. Honor hunger cues, people. It's a much better way to go.)
My take-aways:
Although I'm all for intuitive living and doing what feels right in your body; I argue that data can inform the way we live. The FitBit is one such source of information for me. It keeps me more mindful of my body and the fact that my body is created to move, frequently, as in every hour, not just for my 30 minutes of daily exercise. I look at the clock less at night since I know I can check my FitBit dashboard to see how I slept. I notice when I have a fever or I am stressed because my heart rate noticeably rises. I feel more in tune with my body overall, and let's be honest, being able to have at least one measurable goal (as in steps) a day that is reasonably achievable is nice.
In conclusion:
Is the FitBit for everyone? No. Technology is a first-world privilege. Step trackers are definitely not a necessity in life. And plenty of other companies make step trackers. Nor will the FitBit necessarily help with mindfulness. Checking steps can become obsessive and compulsive. If you struggle in that way, maybe it's not right for you. Can steps become an idol? Probably yes to that, too.
In summary, the FitBit is helpful for me right now. I use it. I'm thankful for it. Yes, paradoxically, a concrete external data provider is actually part of my mindfulness practice. Contradictions sometimes do exist.
