Real Life Marriage: Home

I have had a lot of homes. Having moved many times as a child, I gave the title "home" to numerous structures and dwelling places spread out over multiple states. I called the duplex where my husband I lived when we first got married, "home." Our condo became the first home we purchased together, and after nearly a decade in Arizona, this state feels like home. But home has other definitions, too.

When my parents moved to Texas, part of my heart's home moved with them. Home to me means comfort and security and safety. I know that I need to ultimately find those in the Lord, but there is something about the familiar of home that brings that early sense of knowing and being known: our couch, our shower, our sheets and towels, our comfortable, well worn bed. Every home has its quirks, but when it is your home, you know them, and sometimes the quirks become almost endearing.

There is something about marriage, about a spouse, that becomes a home, too. That has happened for me over the past seven years as my husband has become not only my friend, partner, and lover; but also my confidant, adventure partner, and general holder-upper.

My husband is my person. He has quirks, sure, but I probably have more. I am far from truly knowing him, but there is a comfort, a familiarity, a trustworthiness, a security that I have with him and not with anyone else. I think it's supposed to be this way. We're in life together. Through marriage, God made us need each other. He made us better together. He enabled us to build a home together.

I'm not alone in coming to see home as with my husband. Shauna Niequist (2020) writes of her husband Aaron, “Wherever we are in the world, when I’m with you, I’m home.” I couldn't say it better. For now, Arizona is our home, but someday, it might not be, and that's okay. Sure, parts of my heart are in other places, as long as my people are in other places, but the biggest piece of my heart is always with my husband. He is home.

Reference:

Niequist, S. (2020, August 25). 19 years. In our vows, 19 years ago, I said to Aaron, “Wherever we are in the world, when I’m. [Image attached] [Status update]. Facebook. https://www.facebook.com/sniequist/posts/3830985810251906/