An Argument for Attending Church in Person

Another one of my centering practices? Attending church. In person. And this comes from someone who has had a complicated relationship with church. I am convicted that I need to attend, though, so I do. After the break of in-person fellowship due to the outbreak of COVID-19, I am more convicted than ever about church, and that I need to attend...in person. Attending church online is something, and we still do it from time to time (like when we are sick, or out of town), but there really is no substitute for in-person attendance.

Going to church in-person requires a lot. It requires getting up early on a weekend. It requires getting dressed. It limits time for a leisurely breakfast. We have to spend time commuting. It takes gas. All of these force us to set aside church as a priority, which is what it should be.

The inconveniences of attending church in person have some benefits. The physical preparations also require mind preparation. The commute time grants minutes of stillness to prepare to hear God's word. Time in the car on the way home grants time for discussion.

The church as a place limits distractions. Sure, attending church from home is convenient, but there are chores, dishes, laundry, and other to-dos right in my face. There are also other "shiny" things that catch my attention, like loud noises outside. I am also much more tempted to look at my phone and otherwise do distracting things that seem less permissible in the actual church building. The church building, in that way, therefore provides accountability. 

The people of the church also provide accountability. The people we sit with know us and ask about where were when we are absent. Online churches do not have a great way of keeping the hundreds (often thousands, or more) of people who watch accountable. The people we sit with ask about when we miss church not out of legalism, but because they care. Relationships are an important part of the church that online services struggle to offer.

Participation is a crucial aspect of church, especially when it comes to church rituals and ceremonies. Sure, you can sing at home, and baptize at home, and commune at home, but there is something different about doing it in person (Gunderson, 2020). Similarly, there is the doing of life with church members. I have sometimes learned more from conversations with other people than I have from the sermon itself (for example, the man we sit with talking about progressive sanctification as living in a "mixed" condition between our sinful lives here on earth and our glorified lives in heaven). At our church, there are certain "body life" issues (eg church discipline and church support for personal matters) that the church only addresses in person. This is important for the privacy of the individuals, but if we want to help, we have to be there to hear about the need. As Thom Rainer (2020) points out, in-person church attendance is also a way to encourage pastors, and we want that, if we want to keep hearing the Word from them!

There are practical matters, too. As good as technology is, live streams can get interrupted. Internet service can go down. Important parts of a service can get missed. Is some church better than no church? Certainly, but a full church experiences happens best in person.

Going to church is a habit for me. It's something that requires self-discipline, rather than something that comes easy. I could go to church online. (I do go to church online sometimes.) For me, though, and for my husband and I as a couple, being there, were our feet on the floor and our bodies in seats is important. For that reason, we keep doing it. We are committed to keep doing it for as long as we are able, or until Jesus Christ returns.

References:

Gunderson, D. (2020, June 13). 10 reasons to come back to church after COVID-19. Crossway. https://www.crossway.org/articles/10-reasons-to-come-back-to-church-after-covid-19/

Rainer, T.S. (2020, June 1). Five reasons you need to get back in the habit of church attendance. Church Answers. https://churchanswers.com/blog/five-reasons-you-need-to-get-back-in-the-habit-of-church-attendance/

Crocheted Bible "Sweater"

Reading your Bible a lot can lead to wear and tear. For this reason, I have always liked using a Bible cover. My parents gave me a nice cover for my current Bible, but I was curious if I could also crochet one. I searched for a few patterns, and then found one that I altered.

Basically, I crocheted a long rectangle and then slip stitched the corners together to make flaps into which I could tuck the Bible covers. I then slip stitched the edges in between to make it look even.

Not perfect, but it will cover the Bible. I think the color blocking I did makes the cover look like a sweater, hence calling it a Bible "Sweater." I used my size J Boye ergonomic crochet hook again. I followed the book cover pattern at Me 'N My Hook, but since I used a J hook, my gauge was much larger. (This worked to my advantage, since I was covering a fairly large study Bible. I used Red Heart saffron yarn, and some random red yarn my husband had. (He knits with it!) All in all, I think I am satisfied with this project. (If anyone needs a Bible cover, comment below. I can probably perfect this pattern and whip out a few more fairly quickly.

Here's to reading our Bibles more, and if needed, covering them to protect and preserve their contents for future use!

Real Life Marriage: The Value of the Word

Marriage is not easy. If you go the way of the world and choose marriage to make you happy, you soon find yourself disappointed. If you go with the Christian idea that marriage is supposed to make you holy, not happy, you miss the joy. To have a good marriage, you must be a student of the Word. I knew this in theory when I got married. In real life, I find myself needing to return to the Word again and again.

God's Word tells me that marriage has value. Genesis shows that it was not good for man to be alone (Gen 2:18), and how God created woman as man's helper. Ephesians 5 reflects the created order of marriage, and how marriage images Christ's relationship with the church. Proverbs and Ecclesiastes show how marriage can be a source of joy. Marriage is a good thing. When times are hard and days are dark, I need that reminder from a source of truth. God's Word is that truth.

The Word tells me who I am supposed to be as a wife, and how I can be a blessing to my husband's life. Noble and prudent are some of the adjectives that describe the wife that is a blessing in the Old Testament (Prov 12:4, 19:14). The New Testament tells me about submitting to and respecting my husband (Eph 5:22-33; Col 3:18). These are not things that come naturally to me. I need reminders.

Reading the Bible convicts me of the many ways that I fail as a wife. I fail when I disgrace my husband (Prov 12:4). I fail when I am quarrelsome (Prov 19:13). To be unfaithful is to fail not only my husband, but also God. I want to do neither.

I would like to say that I know everything the Bible has to say about marriage. The reality is that I don't. I need the Word. I need its truth. I need its correction. The Word has immense value, most of all because it leads me to the author of marriage, and the author of life, God the Father, and He is of the greatest value!

How to Motivate Yourself to Read Scripture (Based on Your Tendency)

 

Daily Bible reading. It's one of the best things I can recommend to stay centered. It helps me find perspective. It encourages me, convicts me, gives me hope. I have several generations of Bible readers in my family, so I am blessed in that I have seen many ways to make Bible reading work. The key is to figure out what motivates you, and then use that to your advantage.

My best friend recommends that I read The Four Tendencies by Gretchen Rubin (2017) last year, and it has revolutionized the way I look at motivation. The book lays out the four tendencies, or motivation styles, of most people. There are the upholders, who meet inner and outer expectations (Rubin, n.d.). They just want to know what to do. Questioners meet internal expectations. They need to know why to do something.  Obligers meet outer expectations. They need other people. Rebels don't uphold any expectations. They want freedom to do their own thing, the thing that fits for them. (To find out which you are, take the quiz at Gretchen Rubin's website.) What's that got to do with Bible reading? Well, once you know how you are motivated, you can figure out how to get committed to the centering habit of daily Bible reading.

I am an upholder, so habits are fairly easy for me. Personally, I just need a plan, and having itout in front of me keeps me on it. I'm not bragging. It's just the way I am. (And there are some definite downsides to this trait!) I personally use the One Year Bible daily reading plan (n.d.), but there are others just like it that lay out what to read each day of the year. There are even apps that will deliver a daily Bible reading (or daily Bible reading recording) to you each day. Did you know it only takes 12 minutes of reading a day to get through the Bible in one year (Crossway, 2018)? That right there is motivation enough for me to read daily!

But what if you're a questioner? Good question! Find your reason why. I could give you reasons to read the Bible, but you'd probably just question them, so I encourage you to find your own. Once you do, there can be no turning back.

If you are an obliger, ask a friend, partner, or child to join you in daily Bible readings. (Maybe even set aside a daily time to meet and discuss, either virtually or in person?) There are also online communities such as Facebook's Twelve Minutes (n.d.) group that you can join. Just find your people, and read the Bible with them. It might just become a center point in your relationships.

If you're a rebel, decide if you really believe that reading Scripture matters. For that matter, search the scripture to see what it says about your relationship to it. Talk to your pastor. Question close friends. Figure out if this is really for you or not. If it is, do it. If not, figure out your own centering practice.

I am embarking on the centering practice of reading through the Bible once again this year. The habit of reading the Bible grounds my days, and the content of what I read grounds my mind. God always has something new to show me through reading His Word, and I am here for it. Will you join me?

References:

Crossway. (2018, November 19). Infographic: You have more time for Bible reading than you think. https://www.crossway.org/articles/infographic-you-can-read-more-of-the-bible-than-you-think/

One Year Bible. (n.d.). The One Year Bible Daily Reading Plan. One year Bible online. https://oneyearbibleonline.com/daily-oyb/?version=51&startmmdd=0101

Rubin, G. (2017). The four tendencies: The indispensable personality profiles that reveal how to make your life better (And other people's lives better, too). Harmony.

Rubin, G. (n.d.). The four tendencies quiz. Gretchen Rubin. https://gretchenrubin.com/quiz/

Rubin, G. (n.d.). A guide to "The four tendencies" personality framework. The Happiness Project. https://the-happiness-project.com/blogs/tools/four-tendencies-guide

Twelve minutes. (n.d.). In Facebook [Community page]. Retrieved December 28, 2022 from https://www.facebook.com/groups/twelveminutes/.

Centered.

"New Year; new you" is not how I roll. I am not about reinventing myself, or trying to adhere to strict diets, or protocols, or lifestyles as a way to start a new year. Been there. Done that. It doesn't work.

What I am about is intention. I see the new year as a chance to re-examine, re-configure, and re-focus. As I re-examined my goals for last year, I see that I had to many. I didn't make big goals, but I made a lot of little, very specific goals. I accomplished a lot of them, but not all of them. That leads me to see that this year, I need to simplify, again. There is nothing wrong with goals, but I need to be able to accomplish them.

Once again this year, I need to reconfigure to focus on what matters. We've had life changes, major budget expenditures, illness and more this past year. These lead us to need to regroup and perhaps do things differently.

I particularly want to re-focus. I don't think I have lost my center per se, so much as focused on too many things that did not matter as much as I thought they did. Everything tends to be urgent and/or a crisis for me. My husband often reminds me that it is not. That does not always help in the moment, though. What I need is to have both a larger perspective and a smaller focus. I need to be able to accommodate more of the unexpected while remaining tied to what matters. Because what matters is what keeps me centered. When I am centered, I believe I am of more use to God, others, and even myself.

So on that note, here's to a more centered 2023, and perhaps a few more blog posts along that topic.

Happy New Year!

Top Ten of 2022

I guess my top nine Instagram posts and top ten blog posts (primarily read on Facebook) have really started to diverge. My top nine was all about yoga, something I've done less of, but engaged more with on social media this year:

And the majority of my top ten blog posts had to do with marriage:

Real Life Marriage: Doing Love Wrong...Again!

Three R's for Rekindling Romance

100 Books

It Shouldn't Be This Way

Watching and Waiting with Expectancy

Couple Crafting

Real Life Marriage: Doing it Together

I'm Having a Reckoning.

What to Do? What to Do?

Marathon Marathon 2022 10K Recap

I don't know if people are just interested in my marriage, or if what I write resonates. Either way, I hope readers benefit.

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Until 2023...

Happy New Year!

Resolutions for This Time

I wrote these resolutions back in 2020, during my first bout with the COVID-19 virus. I based them on the John Piper book (2011), Don't Waste Your Cancer, and Jonathan Edwards' 65 resolutions. I have kept them posted on my bulletin board to remind myself to keep perspective when things do not go my way, particularly during illness. As my household, and many others, I gather, have faced illness again this Christmas, it seems appropriate to share these resolutions here:

Resolutions For This Time

1. Recognize my need (for The Savior).

2. Repent of known sins. (Resolve to avoid additional sins.)

3. Read the Bible daily. (Study some.)

4. Fulfill responsibilities (marriage, work, house, home, etc.)

5. Slow down/spend time (Reduce injury; build relationship).

6. Worship instead of worry. (Give thanks.)

7. Eat good food. (In general, just eat).

8. Keep to sleep. (Go to bed on time.)

9. Grieve (recognizing that any losses are temporal and not eternal).

10. Have fun (yoga, games, movies etc.).

If you are healthy, may you stay well.

If you are ill, may you rest.

May you heal.

May you make the most of this time,

because sick or not,

it is time we won't get back.

References:

Edwards, J. (2006). The resolutions of Jonathan Edwards. Desiring God. https://www.desiringgod.org/articles/the-resolutions-of-jonathan-edwards

Piper, J. (2011). Don't waste your cancer. Crossway.