The Simplified Life (An Update)

You know that word I chose for the year? (Simplify. Yes, it's also a form of my blog title.) I am realizing it has a lot more nuance than I thought. When I chose it, I imagined simplifying, paring down, doing less. I am realizing I don't really want to do that, or at least all of that. As of now, simplifying is looking more like prioritizing what is really important.

I like variety, really, I do! When I read about people eating the same breakfast every day, the inner me revolts (Becker, n.d.). Sure, I eat varieties of the same breakfast most of the time, but I also like to switch things up! When I read about minimalism and think about paring down, I get it, but I also don't want to do it. There are a lot of little used things that bring me great joy when I do use them (think bundt and doughnut pans in the kitchen), and I want to keep them. I have also come to the conclusion that some splurge buys are worth it, like random new flavors of things, which are totally a gimmick, but bring me joy, and little holidays things that just enhance the mood. [Thanks, Hungry Runner girl (2024) for reminding that "novelty can enhance our moods."] I guess, at least for right now, the minimalism version of simplifying is not for me.

So what am I doing? I am trying to prioritize. I'm trying to stop doing things that feel like have-tos, but really aren't. For example, I like doing a lesson of DuoLingo every day to keep my brain sharp, but why do I have to keep up with the quests? They just eat up my time and make me angsty. Next! I am also trying to reduce items in my fridge and pantry, not to get rid of variety, but to limit it so that it is less overwhelming. In terms of cooking, I am making larger batches of things and freezing them. This gives us variety, with a little less work. (Thank you, husband, for buying us a chest freezer and being willing to eat frozen and reheated food.) I am also trying to make less recipes that require me to buy unique ingredients. When I do buy those ingredients, I am trying to have a plan for using them up. Again, this results in less overwhelm and decision fatigue for me.

In terms of my closet, I am not trying to pare down to a capsule wardrobe. I have some single, or rarely used items that bring me great joy! I am trying to work through wearing everything in my closet, though. There are a lot of pieces that probably have neutral value and aren't needed (eg t-shirts), and when I find those, I am trying to set them aside so that I can consider getting rid of them. Things I have discovered? That though I have a lot of leggings and yoga pants, I have already worn them all, multiple times! Having less would just necessitate more frequent laundry. No thanks!

What will this journey towards a simplified life look like by year's end? I truly don't know. Whatever comes, may I be receptive to the Lord and what He has to teach me!

References:

Baron, J. (2024, January 26). Friday favorites! Hungry runner girl. https://hungryrunnergirl.com/2024/01/friday-favorites-259.html#

Becker, J. (n.d.). You eat less variety than you think. Embrace it. Becoming minimalist. https://www.becomingminimalist.com/meals/

When the Same Words Mean Different Things

We have been having a discussion about words in our house. I ask my husband how I can care for him. He states that he doesn't want to be cared for. He wants to be supported. I want to be cared for. He doesn't always know how to do that for me. We're speaking the same language, but we're speaking differently.

My husband wants my support. He wants me behind him. He appreciates it when I do things for him. Care to him, though, means that he is inadequate, that he is somehow unable to take care of himself. When I use that word, it offends him, demeans him. It is not my intent, but that is the message my care delivers.

I, on the other hand, can get offended when my husband says he doesn't want to be cared for. I feel that it demeans my service and love. When he says he does not want to be cared for, I feel like he is saying he doesn't want me to do what I think a godly wife should do. That makes me feel inadequate. That's not what he's saying. Our words just mean different things.

To further complicate the matter, we need different things. I want to be cared for and supported. I wanted to be valued, treasured, and doted on as well as supported. I don't want to be treated as am imbecile, but the reality is that I am "the weaker partner" (New International Version, 2011, 1 Peter 3:7). I need care and support because I really can't do life on my own. It's just the way God made me. God, in his grace, gave me a husband who can do these things, but communicating it is a whole different struggle.

Support and care are both important in a marriage. What they mean, though, can differ by spouse, and by relationship. We are figuring out what they mean in our marriage. We are discovering that the same word can mean different things. Maybe eventually we will get on the same page, but for now, we are trying to learn how to honor our differences so that we can love well, and love better. To God be the glory.

Endurance, Patience, Perseverance

I never quite know what I am getting into when I choose a word for the year. This year is no different. I chose endurance, knowing I needed to learn and practice it, but not knowing how much. I am not not sure I really knew what endurance meant, either. I thought it was staying power, standing fast and lasting through the hard times. I am learning that endurance truly means so much more.

As I have studied through Romans, I have learned more about endurance. In Romans 15:4, the King James Version [KJV] translates endurance, "patience." There are some nuances to the word that do quite equate with patience (Thayer, 2011), but there is a relationship, a relationship which connotes some waiting, waiting not just for the hardship to be over, as I have been doing, but waiting with hopes of good things on the other side. Believers are not promised good things in this world. The Bible promises trouble on earth (John 16:33). The Bible promises eternal life for believers in heaven, however, and that is worth hopefully enduring and waiting for.

Biblical endurance also has connotations of perseverance. Again, the KJV translates the word endurance in the English Standard Version [ESV] translation of Hebrews 12:1. The New International Version translates the same word perseverance. What is the difference between the two? According to Difference Between (2015), "endurance is experiencing or surviving pain or hardship," while "perseverance refers to continuing in spite of difficulty and lack of success." So endurance means staying, while perseverance means forward motion. The Bible as a whole commands us to do both.

Endurance requires stamina (Merriam-Webster, n.d.). But how do I endure biblically, in a way that honors and glorifies God? That is another matter. From a recent sermon, I learned that God-honoring endurance means running well (Walters, 2021). Endurance means looking for the joy, and not just seeing the hardship. Endurance also requires perspective, something I think I often lack when trying to stand my ground.

God is enlarging my view of what it means to endure this year. His plans are always so much greater than mine. So may I, by his power, endure. May I practice patience. May I persevere. May I have the perspective that this is all for the greater good of God's glory, because when it comes to endurance, only God endures forever.

References:

Hasa. (2015, October 17). In Differencebetween.com. Retrieved from https://www.differencebetween.com/difference-between-endurance-and-vs-perseverance/

Merriam-Webster. (n.d.). Endurance. In Merriam-Webster.com dictionary. Retrieved October 11, 2021 from https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/endurance

Strong, J. (1890). G5281-hypomone. In Strong's exhaustive concordance of the Bible. [e-book edition]. Retrieved from https://www.blueletterbible.org/lexicon/g5281/kjv/tr/0-1/

Thayer, J. H. (2011). Strong's NT 5281. In Thayer's Greek Lexicon. [electronic database.] Retrieved from https://www.blueletterbible.org/lexicon/g5281/kjv/tr/0-1/.

Walters, W. (2021, July 25). Embrace the race. Retrieved from https://willowhills.church/series/stand-alone-sermons.

Endurance: My Word for 2021

Whew! Twenty-twenty was a year, wasn't it? And although we have turned the page on the calendar, it isn't over yet? What do I mean by that? Well, COVID-19 defined much of what was 2020: social distancing, quarantine, isolation, illness, death, new rhythms of life and work, etc. And COVID-19 isn't gone. It won't ever be gone, but perhaps in the future, less prominent? I sure hope so! So with that sentiment, I begin 2021 with the word endurance.

My word for 2020 was faithful. I wanted to be faithful to my work, my husband, and my faith (not necessarily in that order). Boy, did the year give me a run for my money! I'm not sure I succeeded in being faithful, but I sure tried. And trying it what I want to do in 2021, but maybe with a little more stamina.

I haven't always been a word person. I stole the idea from a dear cousin years ago. My word for that first year was joy, and I kept a journal noting every time I saw the word or experienced it. I don't journal so religiously these days, and sometimes I even forget my word for the year, but usually, it's helpful.

The word endurance came to me on a morning walk one day. Lamenting the struggles of 2020, I wasn't planning to choose a new word, but then the Holy Spirit impressed this one on me. I don't want to ignore it.

Verses help me found my conception of my word for the year, so a few for the word endurance are:

"Fight the good fight of the faith. Take hold of the eternal life to which you were called when you made your good confession in the presence of many witnesses" (1 Timothy 6:12, New International Version).

"Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us" (Hebrews 12:1).

How do I want to practice endurance?

In my work: By finding new ways to be faithful to my tasks and make my job sustainable.

In my home life: By seeking out ways to not just survive, but thrive amidst all the to-dos.

In my running: To both build endurance and find practices that help me make running sustainable for the long run.

In my marriage: By continuing old practices and by instituting new ones to help our commitment stand the test of time.

In my faith: To not grow weary in doing good, but to keep up spiritual disciplines and to trust God when it's hard, especially when it's hard.

Endurance. That's my word. That's my prayer for 2021. May God grant it to me should it be His will.

Entering the Social Foray

I'm going to enter the social foray for a moment. I may regret it, but the issue at hand is important enough to me to worth the risk. If you disagree, feel free to engage in healthy debate with me. I will discuss, but not argue. And I will not shame. As Brene Brown says, shame is never a good motivator.

With that being said, what I want to discuss is the saying, "God is still on the throne," or better yet, "God is still sovereign." I've seen some posts lately stating that this phrase can be associated with oppression. The argument is that the phrase denotes lack of action by God during horrific world events such as pestilence, famine, plague, and annihilation. If God is still on the throne, why doesn't He act? This philosophical question of why God allows suffering has been around for ages, and I'm not here to answer it. I am here to say that I believe in the truth that God is sovereign and I think we should still say it.

Some argue that instead of saying, "God is is still on the throne," we should say, "God is with us." I can agree with that statement. God is with us, dwelling on earth through the gracious deposit of the Holy Spirit in the hearts of believers. But to say, "God is with us," and not say, "God is still on the throne," I believe, is lacking in theological strength.

God is still on the throne. Scripture says so:

"The One enthroned in heaven laughs; the Lord scoffs at them. He rebukes them in his anger and terrifies them in his wrath, saying, 'I have installed my king on Zion, my holy mountain'” (Ps 2:4-6, New International Version [NIV]).

"He sits enthroned above the circle of the earth, and its people are like grasshoppers. He stretches out the heavens like a canopy, and spreads them out like a tent to live in" (Isaiah 40:22).

"But about the Son he says, “Your throne, O God, will last for ever and ever; a scepter of justice will be the scepter of your kingdom" (Heb 1:8).

God is sovereign. His plans are higher than ours (Isa 55:8-11). He works all things together for our good (Rom 8:28). The circumstances of our lives may not feel good, but God is good, and he can use all things to bring Him glory.

But is the truth that God is sovereign sufficient theology? I argue that it is not. God is also with us. Jesus came to earth as "Immanuel," which means "God with us" (Matt 1:23). And He is coming back (1 Thess 4:16-17)! So it is right to say that God is with us. Let's add this to, "God is still on the throne."

If Jesus came to earth as a baby and ascended after his death and resurrection, though, is God still with us? Yes! God indwells believers through the Holy Spirit (John 14:16). He is a "deposit guaranteeing our inheritance" (Eph 1:14). God is not just sovereign, not just with us, but also in and among us! How cool is that?

God is still on the throne. God is with us. God is in us. The three go together. To make any one statement without the other denies the triune nature of God. And that borders on heresy. That is a problem.

So if you see statements about God being on the throne and you disagree, I encourage you to add an, "and still with us," "and still in us" rather than recommend erasure. Cancel culture gets us nowhere. Good theology? That's a start. For with good theology comes Christlike action, God-imaging, and Holy Spirit inspired movements. The world needs more of those.

*Thank you to my husband for his input into and review of this post.

I AM

Do you ever think about the way you talk about yourself?

I am tired.

I am lonely.

I am scared.

--

I am confident.

I am able.

I am energized.

--

I am unable.

I am [my diagnosis].

I am what they say.

--

I am supported.

I am loved.

I am in community.

--

Which words give you energy? Which words sap your strength? Which words cause you to reach out to others? Which words lead you to self-pity? Worth thinking about....

--

On the flip side, have you ever studied how God talks about Himself?

"I am the bread of life" (John 6:48)

"I am the light of the world" (John 8:12).

"I am the gate for the sheep" (John 10:7).

"I am the good shepherd" (John 10:11).

"I am the resurrection and the life" (John 11:25).

"I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me" (John 14:6).

"I am the vine; you are the branches" (John 15:5).

"I am the Living One; I was dead, and now look, I am alive for ever and ever! And I hold the keys of death and Hades" (Revelation 1:18).

"I am making everything new" (Revelation 21:5).

"I am the Alpha and the Omega, the First and the Last, the Beginning and the End" (Revelation 22:13).

"I am coming soon" (Revelation 22:20)

--

Jesus also says things like, "I am thirsty" (John 19:28). Most of the time, though, when He said, "I am," He was talking about His enduring character, His enduring nature as God. He talked in present tense, about who He was, about what he could do. Could we learn from this? What we are is because of what the eternal I AM made us. What we can do, what I am is because of I AM.

--

If He is the bread, I am energized.

If He is the light, I am light.

If He is the gate, I am on a path.

If He is the Shepherd, I am directed.

If He is the resurrection, I am eternal.

If He is the truth, I am true.

If He is the vine, I am able in His strength.

If He is the life, I am living.

If He is Creator, I am creative.

If He is eternal, I have purpose.

If He is coming soon, I am living with hope.

--

I AM because of I AM!

--

*This post was inspired by Ashley LeMieux's "I Am" podcast.

Things We Say, but Probably Shouldn't

"In the multitude of words sin is not lacking, But he who restrains his lips is wise" (Prov 10:19, New King James Version).

Oh, words. I believe they have power, but yet we throw them around so lightly:

The weather is bipolar.

I have a love affair with....
I'm not married to that.
That's so retarded.
Shoot me.
I bet....

Words these are, but words that have meaning. Words that could demean. Words that could have offend. Bipolar disorder is a real illness, one the weather can't have. And perhaps if I say those words in the hearing of someone struggling with this disorder, I belittle their battle. Love is a powerful thing. To say I love a thing, or even more so, to have an affair with a thing, can demean love, and be an affront to the very real and important love I have with my husband in marriage. Some things may feel stupid or dumb, but retarded is not a good descriptive word to use. I might argue it is never a good word to use. And talking about killing is dangerous, especially to little ears who may not fully understand sarcasm. The betting phrase? A kid at worked called me out on it saying, "We don't bet." Duly noted. Gambling is not a habit I endorse, and my words should follow suit.

Words have power, friends. Are you using them wisely? I know I am convicted that I need to attend to my own words a little more carefully. Some more restraint might be in order, both for the respect of others, and for myself.

Saying No

Saying, "No," to things that disrupted my very structured way of life was never very hard for me. I liked the safety and control that saying, "No" gave me. I willingly turned down opportunities to get off the beaten path of life because the straight and narrow felt right (and I'm not talking morals here). But in this season of resettling, I've told myself that I need to start saying, "Yes" more. I need to start saying, "Yes," when people invite me to do things, even if it feels uncomfortable or the timing isn't "right." I need to start trying new things, things that I might not think I like. I need to be brave, take risks, sit with discomfort.

But in this season of saying, "Yes," I've realized that I still have to say, "No."  I have to say, "No" to extra work opportunities, even when they feel important. I have to say, "No," to service opportunities because they don't seem right for me.  I have to say, "No" to non-essential items on my to-do list, things that used to be important to me, like having a clean car, or trying to keep things "perfectly" organized. Sometimes I have to say, "No" to my preferred early bedtime or preparing and eating healthy food. I've certainly had to say, "No," to sitting at home on social media, which I enjoy, but really isn't that productive. Changing my, "No" to the unknown to a, "No" to the known feels unsafe and uncomfortable and scary. But it also feels right.

If life is about living, I need to to expect the unexpected, find joy in the journey, and give my scared yeses more and more often. It's kind of crazy that embracing life still means saying, "No," but hopefully those noes make room for the yeses that need to happen.

Self-Improvement

I recently completed Paige Schmidt's 10-day Authentically You course. (I'm kind of a self-improvement junkie and jump on courses that are free and not gimmicky-which Paige's aren't.) In completing the course, I kept coming back to the idea of approaching self-improvement from a stance of worthlessness versus from a place of worthiness. Let me explain.

When I try to improve myself to gain worth, I fail. I can never do enough to please my perfectionist self. I can never do enough to please my judgmental peers. I can never do enough to gain complete, unmerited favor with my family. Simply put, I am not enough to please people 100% of the time. So improving myself to gain approval isn't going to work.
On the other hand, if I operate from a place of worthiness, I work to improve myself because I love myself and want my life to be better. When I learn to love myself more, I get out of the head space of trying to earn worth. When my life is better, I have more energy to attend to the needs of other people and serve them well. So operating from a place of worthiness is not necessarily selfish or self-centered. How do you operate from a place of worthiness? That is probably another post for another time.

For now, I encourage you to stop trying to improve yourself from a place of worthlessness. Stop saying:

"I'll be beautiful when I lose X pounds." 
"I'll be strong when I gain X pounds of muscle."
 I'll be happy when I get a promotion at work."
"I'll be content when I find a person to marry."
"My life will be worth something when I make a difference."

Don't stop working towards self-improvement and healthy goals. Just approach them differently. Approach them from a place of worthiness:

"I'm trying to improve my nutrition so that I'll have more energy to play with the dog I love."
"Weight-lifting is a good habit to have for relieving stress."
"I know I am capable of moving up the ladder at work and am working toward it."
"I love myself and can't wait to find a person to share love with for the rest of my life."
"I believe I have something to give to the world, so I work with integrity and hope."
Changing our self talk requires work. But I think that work with be worth it, and actually contribute to more success with our self-improvement projects.

Thoughts? Comments? I'd love to hear you motivate yourself to work towards self-improvement. Which strategies work, and which don't?